walking in the rain

Finally, September has come to a close. It's been an insane one, almost unbearable.

Of course, it's been quite a happening month as well. I'll write more when I get the time.

Looking forward to a brand new month with, hopefully, less activities revolving around my life.

It'll also be the month where I finally ORD, after 2 years of being in the army. Yeah baby. :)

It has reached a point when I’m completely burnt out by everything that’s happening in my life.

Everyone and everything just needs and wants a piece of me, which I’m not able to provide, causing unhappiness among some.

There are just millions of things I have to do each day, and my plate is completely overflowing. Although I’ve been on off and leave for most of the days this month, this doesn’t mean I’m free. In fact, I’m busier than ever.

Sometimes I wish we don't have to sleep, then we can get lots of other things done.

I have to stress again that my schedule is planned about a month in advance, and any requests to meet up (especially for lunch/dinner) must be done so at least two weeks in advance, otherwise it’s very difficult for me to slot you in.

There are so many people to meet each and every single day, errands to run, classes to give (thank God one of my student’s exam is over), parents to meet, events to go for, tons of gigs to run and prepare for, scoring to do, clients to meet, rehearsals to attend, recees to do, vettings to go for, performances to handle, parties to attend, as well as so many other commitments like church and stuff. And this is on top of the so many other things I have to settle daily, as well as the whole chunk of excting stuff like movie previews I have to go for every now and then.

It makes things worse when the requests and calls come in fast and furious. In fact, my phone has been completely ringing off the hook for the past few weeks, with calls and messages rolling in back-to-back-to-back-to-back like nobody’s business. It’s as hot as a radio station hotline, if not, hotter. It’s completely scary.

And everything that’s been happening has nothing to do with camp, or company shows, for that matter, so that makes it even more freaky. I can’t believe I’m actually more busy when I’m on off and leave.

It’s not that I’m not lovin’ my life. In fact, I am. It’s just that, well, I’m not a machine. And I can’t simply accept your requests (whatever they may be) just because you want me to. I don’t have the time nor the energy to do so. I can’t simply put everything aside to spend my time doing these things because I have to give priority to things which are more urgent as well as events that have already been planned for the day. I’m sick and tired of people not understanding my situation, because, believe it or not, I really have a lot of things to do, so cut me some slack.

I love you all, but I’m tired, and I need a break too.

In other news, for the second time in my life, I actually picked up the phone today and dialed 999. I don't wish to go into details, but lets just say that I wanted someone to be arrested, which, in the end, the police wasn’t exactly able to do so, so never mind. Don’t get the wrong idea though.

In other bigger news, I finally plucked up my courage and did it today! Yeah baby.

In other even bigger news, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DT AND HUI! You girls rock my world. :)

And this is one of them.

Oh God I am such a fool.

Nope, it’s got nothing to do with Harry Potter. It’s just that there’s been quite a number of deaths recently, and I must say I’m deeply saddened having to read such news – from the siblings who died in the Hougang fire, to the recent tremors, to the trailer driver which had steel rods crushing his entire front cabin, and even to the most recent plane crash, which killed 89 people in an instant.

I remember I was silently thanking the Lord for bringing me through 2 years of my life in MDC when I was at my last show at the Istana. That was around 7.15pm. It was also around that time when tremors rocked Sumatra, with aftershocks being felt in Singapore.

For the record, I didn’t experience the tremors. In fact, I didn’t even feel a thing.

Although I guess most Christians do believe that God has a plan for us, it can be quite freaky to know that your life can end at any moment.

There was a funeral at the void deck of the block next to mine recently (interestingly enough, there was a Malay wedding at the void deck of the block next to it). I found it strange because there wasn’t any form of religious items at the funeral, which was something I had seen for the first time. I guess the deceased was probably a free-thinker. Coincidentally, that was also the week where my student’s grandmother had passed away.

Anyway, recently, I’ve been bumping into all sorts of people while travelling from place to place. A couple of days ago, I was walking to the kopitiam to have my lunch when I walked past the lady from KFC. About 15 minutes later, I saw the duck noodle auntie from one of my favourite stalls at the MRT station. When I arrived at my destination, I bumped into Jen (who claimed I had a very blur look on my face when she waved at me from afar). After my class, while ordering dinner at the food court, I actually saw M. At first, I didn’t think it was him, but upon a closer look, I was pretty sure it was. It’s been so long since our RA class in 2005 so I didn’t bother saying hi.

You know it can be quite annoying sometimes when things don’t turn out they way you expect them to. It’s the little things that count, really. When I’m late for an appointment, there will be people blocking your path causing you to miss the bus, and the traffic lights are sure to turn red (and I’m not being biased – I check the lights out when I’m not rushing for time). When I decide to sit down and have a nice, slow lunch (it’s rare that I can actually sit down to enjoy my food), there will be cleaners who will decide to mop the area under my table and chair at that very minute and annoy the hell out of me. When I know I’m going to leave my house only for a couple of hours to do some teaching and decide not to gel my hair, I’ll be sure to bump into people that, well, lets just put it this way – it would have made a difference if I had looked more presentable.

Anyway, on a random note, I just want to say that I dislike insurance agents. If you’re one of them, well, I’m sorry. I just get the feeling that insurance agents are all out to cheat people in one way or another. In what way exactly, I wouldn’t know. But I know my gut feeling isn’t wrong.

Well, my mum has been buying insurance for my sister from this really nice guy who comes to my place to explain every single piece of detail, but everytime I walk pass him to get some water from the kitchen, I feel like giving him a slap across the face. Or saying something really sarcastic to piss the hell out of him. That’ll make my day.

On another note, when you’re sitting next to someone in the bus on the MRT, try this. I call it the handphone trick. When you know that the person next to you is awake (well at least make sure he or she isn’t sleeping or doing other stuff like reading the newspapers), just whip out your handphone (if you’re carrying an older phone model like myself, it’s better) and pretend to SMS somebody.

I can almost guarantee you that in a few seconds, the person next to you will do exactly the same thing, and show off that he or she has a better model handphone than yours. Wanna bet? Try it. It works. It’s silly, but at least it’s fun. :)

It’s fast approaching the end of my journey in the army.

It was my last day in camp yesterday. It will be my last 2 performances today and tomorrow, and after which, I won’t be back in camp anymore, except perhaps to return costumes and hop by the e-mart to clear my credits. I actually thought I would be performing more than that, but it appears that I have more offs and leaves to clear more than anything else, so it’s unlikely that I’ll waste that, since it’s about time I reap what I sow. I’ve been waiting for this moment since goodness knows when.

As mentioned earlier, I was back in camp yesterday after not being around for a week or so, and I was totally horrified that so many things had happened during my short absence – from an entire file of scores being lost and managers sending in wrong repertoires to clients, causing the whole type of show to be changed. It’s totally stupid. That would not have happened if I was around, as I would have ensured that the right repertoire would be sent to the client. It shows how useful they are man. It's not that difficult, really.

Which leads me to another issue. I’ve recently been offered a job at my company – it’s a DXO co-ordinator post which basically co-ordinates all the different shows in the company. I guess I was asked to consider for the job as I’ve been at it as an NSF for the past 2 years or so, and I dare say I’ve done a pretty decent job for my managers, which is why I was recommended by them. Of course, if you think about it, it’s dirty work, but I’m not complaining, since I’m in a non-combat unit.

Believe it or not, I did consider the job, until of course I listed out my priorities and kinda figured out that the pay was quite low, considering that most of my evenings will be burnt because I have to go for all the shows to liaise with clients, which is not possible since I already have so many things on my plate. I won’t even be able to do part-time study if I take this up.

Also, I don’t wish to work with retarded people, especially my senior manager, whom, after several recent incidents, has made us conclude that he’s one of the most brainless people around. Not that we didn’t already know from the start.

Here's an SMS I received from my ex-boss recently.

Good days give you happiness.
Bad days give you experiences.

Happiness keeps you sweet.
Trials keep you strong.

Sorrows keep you human.
Failures keep you humble.

Success keeps you glowing.
God keeps you going.

I am intrigued.

I really am.

If only.